What Love is this..

This will probably not be systematically presented. I am using this as more of a grounds to gather in a rough way my thoughts on certain subjects so that they might later be presented in a more systematic format. For the moment I'm going to talk about the preparation one should embrace before entering into a relationship.. Check that.. first I'll address something else.

This is a main point found in the introduction of C.S. Lewis' book, The Four Loves, which had a profound influence on my understanding of the love between the sexes in a very personally applicable way. He says there is a difference between 'nearness by likeness' and 'nearness by approach.' It means this: I can put on an authentic hand stitched uniform, a replica helmet, menacing eye black, cleats, thigh pads, hip pads, shoulder pads, even a cowboy collar and I will look very much like a football player. I am very near by likeness. However, I am no closer to getting into the NFL by parading myself around in such a way at the local stadium or sports bar than the man selling nachos. This is one type of nearness. There is another. It is nearness by approach. There may be a man who goes out after working his long hours into the dead of night and runs sprints, who works with weights, who in fact may very well sell nachos at the stadium. He is in training. He sees the end and does not seek to imitate in appearance but in approach. This man is very near his goal, very near his dream though he does not look the part.

It is the same with love. Let me be extremely personal and speak on my own experiences for a moment. I was once in love with someone. It was not based on lust, neither was it based on Christ. She was my best friend, my closest confidant, and someone I was intimately attached to. Of her I wrote poetry and wrote songs. She was in my thoughts, in my heart, and I would have in an instant given my life for her. It was that grand sort of feeling from which country songs and sappy romantic comedies pour forth. That is the well I drank of and it was indeed real. Yet it was not from God and so it was brought to a crashing end, for which I am each day grateful and each day regretful for my sin in its pursuit. So, let me ask you this..

Do you think that the lost man loves his wife less? Do you think the lost woman loves her child less? Does not the sacrifice of the lost man for his family look a great deal like Christ’s sacrifice? Does the sacrificial love of that mother not resemble in so deep, so natural a way, that love that God the Father has for His sons and daughters? Thus also the Christian may be in love, may share a love that is very like Christ’s but is not from Christ. It is a temptation for those in such a position to say, ‘oh, but I could not feel a love this true if it were not from God.’ This is only partly true. No man could feel any love so true were we not created in the image of God. We know love in the same way we know wisdom, truth, beauty, and justice; we know them because we were created by a God who embodies those characteristics, in whom they are defined. Do not be deceived by some current of noble sentiment. Do not be overwhelmed by such emotional tides for they will carry you no closer to Christ. They are the waves that ripple out from that true Fount and it is at that Fount where all good things lie.

Next time I’ll address what I intended to talk about in this post.. maybe.. and that is the preparation of a man to love and be loved.

With Love,
EP